Confidence is best built through experience and success.
With all else being equal, an experienced trial lawyer is going to feel more confident stepping in front of a jury than someone doing so for the first time.
A major league baseball player taking their 1,000th at bat in the big leagues versus a rookie taking their first.
The problem comes in when you do not have a deep reserve of success to draw on.
How do you feel confident in these situations?
This is the challenge most young athletes face, as do adults when starting a new venture.
Lots of younger athletes naturally tend to be less confident in themselves because they don't have that long history built up.
For parents, it can be hard to watch their kid struggle in situations because of this, especially if they know they have the ability to thrive.
So how do you create confidence before having those successes to draw on?
Although it surely isn't easy to execute, the answer is actually quite simple.
Stay in the moment, and focus on what is within your control.
The enemies of confidence are self-consciousness and loss of focus on the present.
"I'm going to fail because last time..."
"What if I can't? How bad am I going to look?"
"What is ___ going to think? Are they going to laugh or make fun of me?"
As soon as our thoughts shift to the past, the future, or what others are thinking, your confidence is likely non-existent.
Those who can get past those thoughts are ready to focus on the things that actually will lead to confidence over time.
US Soccer legend Mia Hamm explains this tremendously:
"If you're only confident in sports when you're playing really well, you're going to be miserable.
You have to focus on things in your game you have more control over - your defensive work or your effort level. What I found was that this took a lot of pressure off of me, and the goals became a lot easier. I felt this gave me more of a handle on my confidence."
Work on mastering technique.
Focus on effort.
Push your limits.
Live in the present moment, fully dialed in to the task you're working on.
These will help you block out all the noise, and they're a breeding ground for self-confidence.
Even better than that?
People who work like that also tend to see a lot more success over time, which in turn leads to even more self-confidence in the long run.
You have no control over what's already happened, what might happen down the road, or what other people think.
So why live there with your own thoughts?
We all have days when we're doing well in our sport, job, and so on.
There's also days when nothing seems to be going right.
When the latter happens, dial in to what's in your control and lose touch with everything else.
Do this for long enough and not only will your confidence levels explode, but your performance will too.
